Sunday, 5 January 2014

Why New Years Resolutions never work!

How many times have you made yourself a huge list of things that will change with the new year?
How many things on your list do you think you will still be working towards by the end of 2014? How many will turn up again on the 2015 resolution list?

New years resolutions are impossible to uphold, all we do is set ourselves up for failure. Writing that fateful yearly list is nothing more then self sabotage, something that as humans we are already very adept at. But why does it fail? We start with such high hopes and good intentions, but everything falls apart before the dust on the new year has even settled.

The biggest downfall for well meaning resolutions is the sheer size of most peoples list, how many of us put 10 or even 15 things on a list sculpting a huge change in our current lifestyle? Too many things to do at once is overwhelming, where do you start? Faced with the seemingly insurmountable our subconscious has already given up before we have even consciously started.

Working in retail management, where self development and improvement is as mandatory as adapting to change I often struggle with all of my shortcomings and perceptions of failure. I use to write huge lists of skills I needed to hone... Until I was given invaluable advice, a self improvement list should be less then 5 things to work on, three is a perfect number, finish that list before adding more.

Now isn't a list of New Years resolutions a very personal self improvement list? So why are we loading our selves up with so many things at once? Three things a year to work on is such a manageable number, and if we did it one thing at a time we would have 4 months for each resolution to become reality. In my case I have chosen to commit to just one thing and spend a whole 12 months improving one very important aspect of my life.

The other thing that lays waste to our carefully constructed list is a lack of detail (another lesson from retail management), goals should be both challenging and achievable, we don't truly appreciate what we achieve unless we work hard for it and likewise hard work needs to lead us to something for us to continue. What should our hard work lead us to? When is it enough? How will we know we have achieved our gaol and nailed our resolutions?

We need to be able to measure our goals, knowing how far we have come and how much further there is to go. The terms we set in our new years resolutions need to be realistic and specific and we need to give ourselves a fighting chance to achieve them.

For example lets take my one and only commitment for 2014 and break it down. I want to be a published author, so I could write my list of one as Get published, I can even measure that, either I will or will not get published in 2014. It is definitely challenging and seems achievable, but it is open to all kinds of interpretation. It is not specific and with the amount of naivety and innocence I have as a publishing virgin it isn't setting a very realistic picture.

I have a lot of work to do before I am ready to send my manuscript off to publishing houses, publishing is so far away I will surely get disheartened before achieving this goal. Challenging, achievable and measurable with milestones along the way, this is what I need. This is what we all need. So what is my actual one and only New Years resolution?

I will treat my writing like a part time job until such time as I can swap it to a full time job. I will work on editing my WIP, and educating myself about the professional world of publishing. After my WIP is edited and I am ready to seek out a publisher I will keep writing. I will not neglect my blogs, Facebook, Twitter or other tools an author needs like I have in 2013.

There you have it, longer then your usual New years resolution, if I was inclined I could make it into 4 individual yet related resolutions. I know I can achieve this and I know I can watch myself get closer to the dream of being published. It will be challenging finding time for a part time job when I already work a 50 hour a week day job, but I will work hard on my one and only resolution to improve something that is such a central aspect of my life.


I know I can achieve my resolution with hard work and dedication, how about you? What is on your New Years resolution list?

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